Family differences


“You don’t choose your family. They are God’s gift to you, as you are to them.”


–Desmond Tutu

As a Mexican and as a person, my family means everything to me.

Since I was a kid, I remember growing up in an environment surrounded by a big family.

This would include my mom’s parents, her brothers, their wives and kids and my grandparents brothers’s and sisters with their kids as well.

Therefore , whenever there was a family reunion it used to be a big “party”.

There was music, lots of food, alcohol and a little bit of drama.

I also remember that sometimes I used to hate when we used to stay in a party or family reunion way past midnight.

Sleeping on a couch or some chairs while my parents were still having fun.

Now, all that it’s over.

Asking to your mom if you can leave soon
Asking to your mom if you can leave soon

My grandparents are gone and I no longer live in Mexico.

Thankfully, I have my husband and his family.

But now that I’ve had the chance to spend time with my in-laws, I’ve realized how hard could be sometimes to be in an interracial marriage.

I love my husband and his family.

However, I can tell that the difference in our backgrounds has started to hit me.

Indeed, I’d say that I’ve started to feel a little bit nostalgic about those old times and celebrations with my family.

What’s different?

Spending time with my in-laws it’s always good but there are a few interactions that I’d say feel odd to me.

The family reunions are way smaller.

Growing up I got used to spending time with my mom’s side of the family. Therefore, I had a big family and my grand parent’s house was always full of visits.

On the contrary, my husband’s family it’s smaller. Just his mom, step dad and his grand parents.

Mexican families are big!!
Mexican families are big!!

The time spent it’s shorter.

I know that quality it’s more important that quantity.

But it doesn’t mean that you can have only quality in a short period of time.

My uncles used to visit my grand parents every weekend and the time that they used to spend together was long.

They used to play music, talk about family and friends, go out to eat and then come back to keep talking and during all this time they would been drinking beer or whiskey just because .

With my hubby’s family we just get together to have dinner, talk a little bit and maybe have a drink or two but that was it.

They don’t drink coffee!!!!!

Finally, one of the things that’s kinda hard for me is the fact that they don’t drink coffee.

On a daily basis I drink 2 to 3 cups of coffee and when my family used to gather together, in the evening they were always offering coffee to the guests and other family members and if feeling like to, my abuelo would send us to buy bread or a cake to the panaderia for everyone.

Anyway, all those good times in Mexico will always live in my memory and I’d try to adapt a little bit more to my new life and family because you never know how or cultural differences can impact us.

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